Gossip Candy

SO ADAM IS GONNA BE ON LETTERMAN TONIGHT. I TOO GOT A LITTLE PIC OF HIS APPEARANCE. US ALIENS HAVE OUR SOURCES

OF COURSE THIS WAS TAKEN FROM RIGHT BEFORE THE NETWORK CENSORED HIS TOTALLY TASTEFUL FLASHING. GAH! DAMN YOU NETWORKS! SQUASHING ARTISTIC INTEGRITY AND….NUDITY!!! GAAAAAH!!

AND NOW BECAUSE I WANTED TO, A TOTALLY LAST MINUTE, SLAP DASHED, COMPLETELY UNINSPIRED TOP 10 LIST.  LETTERMAN STYLE, BUT CHUNKEYFIED. (I CAN PICTURE MYSELF RIGHT NOW WITH MY OWN DESK AND OWN BALD BANDLEADER TO TOSS WITTY BANTER TO. *SIGH*)

TOP 10 SHOCKING FUTURE ADAM LAMBERT PERFORMANCES

10. COME OUT AND KISS PAUL SCHAEFER.

9. RING OF FIRE. POLKA REMIX.

8. SING NOTHING BUT A RECIPE FOR A KILLER FLAN.

7. TELL US HE IS GAY BUT THAT CHICKS “INTRIGUE” HIM. WAIT. THAT’S NOT SHOCKING!

6. SHOVE RYAN SEACREST’S FACE IN CROTCH. WAIT. THAT’S NOT SHOCKING EITHER! DAMN. I AM BAD AT THIS.

5. WORK US TILL WE’RE ALMOST–BUT NOT TOTALLY–BLOWN. WHAT A DISAPPOINTMENT.

4. SING ALONG PERFECTLY TO REM’S  ‘IT’S THE END OF THE WORLD AS WE KNOW IT’.

3. COME OUT DRESSED ONLY IN A…UM…CERTAIN *RING*

2. EXPLAIN OBAMA’S HEATH CARE PLAN TO THE NATION. WITH GLITTER!

1. BRING OUT TWO HOT CHICKS TO MAKE OUT SO THE NEXT DAY IT CAN BE REPLAYED OVER AND OVER WITHOUT BEING CENSORED.

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