Wait, that’s not Robsten? WTF, my computer seems to be having issues!
With the Kristen Stewart/Robert Pattinson breakup, Blind Gossip solved a bunch of blinds (here, here, and here). Basically, it says Robsten was a fake relationship to promote Twilight and scheduled to run until August 2013, but ended early because that date was picked before they knew when the Twilight DVD promos would be done.
I’m going to have to call tech support. This is not Robsten. There seems to be something wrong with my computer!
This blind talked about how the relationship was supposed to end in August but that promo was done by Spring 2013 and basically said expect a breakup between now and August 2013. I’m just posting this for the people who always say BG doesn’t know anything. They predicted this shit on March 11, 2013 and look, another BG solved as Robsten broke up this past weekend. From The Sun is Setting on this Relationship:
Kristen Stewart knew that all this rejection was making her look bad, and after a meeting with her publicists, she finally decided to let him go.
So, exactly as we told you back on March 11, 2013, the relationship ended before the end of the summer. It took some pushing on Rob’s part, and it happened earlier than Kristen wanted, but it’s done.
I’m posting key parts of these blinds to show how fake relationships work and see if you can spot some familiar trends!
Group Dates/Private Dates with a fan sighting (from Their Upcoming Elopement):
Their most recent outing was set up by her publicist. He is always told where to go meet up with her, either at her place (no, they do not live together), or a friend’s place. Then they all go out together in a group to a public, populated place for a couple of hours. He tries to limit their “dates” to group outings because he doesn’t want to spend time alone with her and he likes having his friends around him as a buffer.
Whoa, I better reboot. This is not Robsten. Hope my computer doesn’t have a virus!
However, there will always be one “private” date where he has to deal with her “alone” in a public setting. Hey, he’s an actor. If he can fake being a non-human for an entire movie, he can fake being on a date with her for one hour! If there aren’t going to be paparazzi present, the publicist also tries to set up some sort of “fan encounter” so photos can be taken as “proof” that they were together. He likes it when the fan encounter happens early in the “date” so that he can go home early. The photos are then posted on some gossip site a day or two later, along with some testimonial by the “fan” about how nice they were and how romantic they were with each other, and his obligation is complete.
Seriously, why does my computer keep doing this? Just pretend it’s Robsten being papped out getting coffee. They could have easily been spotted buying a frying pan like El and Lou. Remember, this?
MY COUSIN JUST SAID SHE SAW LOUIS IN A SHOP BUYING A FRYING PAN WITH ELEANOR AND HE SMILED AT HER IDK IF SHE’S LYING OR NOT??
@1Dstalking Louis was seen in Borehamwood in London buying a frying pan in Morrisons.. They left around ten minutes ago
But, I digress.
The marriage rumors (go to the blind to read the full thing, but look – it’s an article from good ole Hollywood Life):
This complete lie about Rob and Kristen eloping was fabricated by OK Magazine in March 2013, shortly after another PR outing with a “fan encounter” (see pic below). Life & Style and Hollywood Life didn’t want to miss out on the fake excitement, so they repeated the elopement story.
I’ve captured all the engagement rumor headlines here…oh wait. My computer is still messing up. That’s not Robsten either.
Fan pic that proves they are together/subsequent Gossip Site Posting (anyone getting Oman flashbacks?):
And here’s the fan pic that the Daily Mail ran just before the elopement story in March 2013, with the breathless heading “Still going strong! Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart prove they HAVEN’T split as they are reunited after 64 days apart!”
Huh, I could have swore these were fan pics of Robsten taken by and with fans…what the hell?
And this pretty much sums up my feelings on, well, you know. Just replace a few names and I think we see a trend here.
Our condolences to you Twihards who are genuinely upset because you thought the relationship was real. It is sobering and sad to find out that some things are merely an illusion. But it’s time for you to tuck Robsten away on your fantasy mind shelf along with The Tooth Fairy and Santa Claus.
Wait, so that’s not Robsten either? Geez, I’m going to have to call Geek Squad! There’s something seriously wrong with my computer!